My journey is one of love, loss, and renewal.
Hello, I'm Paula Dauber, founder of The Wistful Widow.
In 1996, Duncan, my love, my squeeze, and future husband, entered my life when he moved to Reno from San Diego and started working at the same place as me. Even though we were both in other relationships, we couldn’t ignore the spark that grew as we spent more time together. By June 1998, our connection had deepened. We were both single by then and began dating. Just a few months later, in October, Duncan proposed, and we joyfully married on June 5, 1999, surrounded by friends and family at my family’s ranch. Our life together became a journey filled with love, adventure, and the joy of raising our three wonderful children.
In 2021, we took a leap of faith and bought 20 acres in a small country town in Nevada, fulfilling our shared dream. However, our world turned upside down when Duncan began experiencing troubling heart episodes. After the ER ruled out a heart attack, he traveled for work, planning to get further tests when he returned. Tragically, Duncan never made it home. On June 19, 2021, he passed away suddenly while running in San Jose.
The grief overwhelmed me. I collapsed to the floor when I received the news, and the scream I let out felt like it came from a deep, foreign place. My 10-year-old daughter, in her innocent wisdom, ran out and, thinking I was upset about a show I was watching, said, “Mom, it’s okay. Jesus is coming back soon, and we’ll see Dad again soon.” Her faith at such a young age amazed me.
Amid this profound pain, I felt a stirring in my heart — a calling to help others navigate the path of widowhood. Losing Duncan became a journey of seeking purpose and hope. I knew I needed to connect with others who had walked this path and thrived. From this need, I created The Wistful Widow.
I am on a mission to support and guide newly widowed women through their grief, helping them rediscover hope and purpose. I remember seeing a widowed friend and feeling inspired by her strength and resilience. My deepest hope is that, through our community, I can offer that same hope and support to others on their journey.
As a new widow, you might feel as I once did — lost, alone, confused, abandoned, and heartbroken, with a deep sense of having lost your purpose. I created The Wistful Widow to offer you connection, understanding, and support. Together, we’ll find coping mechanisms, keep doing the things you enjoy or try new ones, and move toward becoming more self-sufficient and empowered.